Clandestine Cake Club - January

Last night the glamorous world of film came to Newcastle's Clandestine Cake Club with the theme "Inspired by the Silver Screen".

The red carpet tablecloth played host to some of the world's most beautiful cakes from Chocolate Cake, head to toe in ganache by Chanel; Blue Velvet, sporting two robins by Valentino, like that time Bjork wore a dress made from a swan; Strawberry Daiquiri, barely covering herself in an exquisite array of fruit by Versace, and Swedish Princess Cake, draped in green marzipan by Primark.


I'd chosen to represent the film "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo". I'd enjoyed reading the trilogy and pictured the Swedish hero Blomkvist - blond, blue-eyed, 40, irresistible to women - as Daniel Craig. Imagine my joy when he was cast in the English language remake of the Swedish films! I don't remember much mention of cake in Stieg Larsson's books, but they make a coffee on every other page and at one point there is an unflinching mention of a cheese & marmalade sandwich. You'd need a slice of cake to wash that down. I chose to make a traditional Swedish prinsesstårta and followed the instructions on this great blog by an American lady living in Sweden. The cake is layers of genoise sponge and vanilla custard, topped with a dome of whipped cream and covered with green marzipan. It is traditionally decorated with a little pink rose.

I ate as much cake as I could but disappointingly got stage fright and hit the wall after only five slices. I loved the pistachio & rosewater and mango & cardamom cakes - one of the great things about Clandestine Cake Club is that you get to try all sorts of different recipes and flavours.


Naturally for a glamorous night of film we had press coverage and were joined by the lovely Jonathan Miles from BBC Newcastle who tried to interview us while we stuffed our faces with cake. Thanks to the Knit Studio for hosting CCC again and for the exclusive after-show party with wine, Doritos and drug-fuelled celebrity orgies (heh, I made that bit up. There were no Doritos). Huge thanks as ever to Lisa for organising it. I'd also like to thank my mom, my dad, my wife, my brother, my dog, my neighbour's dog, a dog I once saw a cute picture of on the internet and now I'd like to do some sobbing.


If you'd like to join Cake Club and get your crumb-covered face in next month's Heat magazine (probably in the circle of shame) visit the website for details and come for an audition. You might need a little lie down on the director's casting couch after you've eaten all that cake.

Salted caramel macaroons

Last month I mentioned that I had my eye on  a certain Mr Salted Caramel. Yesterday I finally made my move as I had a carton of egg whites that needed using. Heh, that old excuse. Works every time.

Initially I wasn't sure it was going to work out for us. The mixture seemed too wet and the piped macaroons wouldn't form a skin. 

Oh ye of little faith! Just as some were once sceptical at the choice of Daniel Craig as James Bond and then he turned out to be to-tal-ly lush,  my macaroons turned out splendidly: smooth, good-looking with a hard exterior but soft on the inside. 

I wasted no time sealing the deal and made salted caramel to sandwich them together. I wondered about decorating them with shimmer, or a dragee, or a small pair of pale blue speedos, but they needed no adornment. Perfect for a Sunday afternoon treat.


Let's just hope they don't let me down by marrying Rachel Weisz. 

The name's Caramel. Salted Caramel.